Book Test #7:
Section 1
Sample Essay - Score of 6
Everyone goes through their lives seeing and experiencing different things. At times, these different
situations may cause one to act differently than another would in the same situation. It can be readily
stated that “Ease does not challenge us; adversity helps us discover who we are.” Through literature,
one can see how this statement proves to be true.
In the play, “The Enemy of the People”, by Henrik Ibsen, the protagonist, Dr. Stockholm, faced
adversity, and through that, was able to discover his true beliefs and who he was. Before Dr.
Stockholm was put in a situation where he had to face adversity, he had lived his life with mild ease
and regularity. He acted just like everyone else in the town he lived in. Years later, he discovered that
the popular bath houses was infected with bacteria. Determined to spread his findings, Dr. Stockholm
went to the newspaper and the local governing office to try and make his discovery known. However,
both the paper and the government weren’t as inspired to really let the public know about this serious
problem due to the popularity of the bath houses. As a result, Dr. Stockholm was forced to face
adversity and find a way to achieve his previously set goal. Through adversity, Stockholm was able to
truely see how his personality was. He was able to understand his severe discontent with the
government and society as a whole. In essence, Stockholm was able to discover his actual self. This,
however, only happened when he was faced with a challenge.
The book, “Where the Heart is” by Billie Letts also used adversity to portray it’s characters true being.
The protagonist, Novalee Nation, was placed in a situation where she had to realize and conquer
adversity. Novalee was a young girl of 17, who was pregnant. She had experienced extreme hardship
her whole life in the trailer park environment that she had previously resided in. She also received lots
of abuse from her boyfriend who impregnated her. In the story, he had left her stranded in a K-Mart
all by herself, while she was pregnant. All alone, Novalle had to find a way to keep herself and her baby
alive. Along the way, through adversity, Novalle found her true, kind self. She also made countless
discoveries through meeting different people. Among those things was her true love for photography
and literature, and most of all her yearning for love in her life.
In the face of adversity, we all act differently. We each have different ideas and methods that we are
accustomed to use for different situations. By acting and making decisions on our own, as we are often
times forced to do when given a challenge, we are able to find out who we truely are and what we
truely believe in. The characters Dr. Stockholm and Novalee Nation are examples of that kind of people
in literature. However, in literature and life, it is all the same. Ease does not challenge us; adversity
helps us discover who we are.
Section 3
1
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer B :
Choice (B) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by providing a noun, "Mother Teresa," that can
be properly modified by the clause "While working . . . Calcutta."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) involves improper modification. The opening clause ("While working . . . Calcutta") cannot
logically modify a time ("that was when . . .").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
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Choice (C) involves an error in modification. The opening clause ("While working . . . Calcutta") cannot
logically modify a time ("then").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) includes a modification error. The opening clause ("While working . . . Calcutta") cannot
logically modify "Mother Teresa's profound love."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) involves improper modification. The opening clause ("While working . . . Calcutta") cannot
logically modify "a profound love."
2
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer B :
Choice (B) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by providing an infinitive ("to hold") to parallel
the earlier infinitive "to return."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) includes excess words. The words "and they would hold " should simply be "to hold."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) results in an illogical statement. It does not make sense to suggest that by agreeing "to
return to their districts," the legislators held a "series of town meetings."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) involves improper idioms. "Returning" is not something that the legislators would logically
"agree with." They would agree "to return" instead. Furthermore, "for holding of" should be the more
idiomatic "to hold."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) distorts the intended meaning of the sentence by suggesting that it was during their trip to
their districts that the legislators agreed to "the holding of town meetings."
3
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer D :
Choice (D) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by providing a main verb ("used") to express a
complete thought.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) is a sentence fragment. There is no main verb (only the verbal "using") to complete the
thought.
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Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) is a sentence fragment. There is no main verb to complete the thought.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) results in an awkward construction that distorts the intended meaning of the sentence. The
"medieval Chinese warriors" performed a single action (using kites to survey enemy troops), not a
two-part action (using kites and surveying) as the sentence suggests.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) involves is an illogical statement. The phrase "used manned kites surveying enemy troops"
suggests that the kites alone were surveying. To properly convey the idea that the kites were used to
survey enemy troops, "in" should be added before "surveying."
4
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer D :
Choice (D) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by providing a singular verb, "was," to agree with
the singular subject, "one."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) involves an error in subject-verb agreement. The plural verb "were" cannot agree with the
singular subject "one."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) involves an error in agreement. The plural verb "were" does not agree with the singular
"something."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves an error in subject-verb agreement. The plural verb "were" does not agree with its
singular subject, "one."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) involves an inappropriate idiom that distorts the intended meaning of the sentence. It doesn't
make sense to say that people thought of a breakfast food "as wrong."
5
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer E :
Choice (E) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by removing unnecessary words.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
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Choice (A) includes excess words. The phrase "a lesser amount of work to do" could be reduced to the
more precise "less work to do."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) makes no sense. It does not make sense to describe "work" as being "least among their
colleagues."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves an error in verb form. The verb phrase "were having" should simply be "had."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) is awkward and confusing. It does not make sense to characterize "the work they had to do"
as "the least of their colleagues."
6
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer E :
Choice (E) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by properly conveying the intended comparison.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) involves an illogical comparison. "Film audiences in the 1950's" cannot logically be compared
with "the 1960's and 1970's."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) results in an illogical comparison. It is not logical to compare "Film audiences . . ." with "the
1960's and 1970's."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) is illogical. "Film audiences" cannot logically be compared with "films."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) involves improper diction. To correctly make the comparison, the words "with the" should be
changed to "did."
7
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer A :
Choice (A) is correct. It avoids the errors of the other choices by properly comparing people ("American
architects") with a person ("Frank Lloyd Wright").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
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Choice (B) presents an illogical comparison. A thing ("inspiration") cannot logically be compared with a
person ("Frank Lloyd Wright").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) results in an illogical comparison. A thing ("Frank Lloyd Wright's architecture") cannot
logically be compared with people ("American architects").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) presents an illogical comparison. People ("American architects") cannot logically be
compared with a thing ("designs").
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) results in an illogical comparison. Things ("Frank Lloyd Wright's inspirations") cannot
logically be compared with people ("American architects").
8
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer D :
Choice (D) is correct. It avoids the errors of the original by properly comparing "poetry" to "fiction" and
"drama" and by correctly completing the correlative construction "either . . . or."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) involves an illogical comparison. Something that occurs "in poetry" cannot logically be
compared to "fiction or drama."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) results in an illogical comparison. "Fiction" cannot logically be compared with something that
happens "in poetry."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves an improper idiom. What comes after each part of the correlative construction
"either . . . or" is not parallel as it should be. "Either" is followed by the prepositon "in," while "or" is
followed by the noun "drama."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) involves an improper idiom. What comes after each part of the correlative construction
"either . . . or" must be parallel, but it is not. "Either" is followed by the noun "fiction," while "or" is
followed by the preposition "in."
9
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer B :
Choice (B) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by removing excess words.
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Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) involves wordiness. The phrase "is the reason why" adds nothing to the setence and so
should be removed.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves an improper idiom. "The reason for why" should be "the reason that."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) is awkward and wordy. The phrase "As a result of economic hardship causing" should be
reduced to the more precise and idiomatic "because economic hardship has been the cause of."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) is awkward and wordy. The phrase "The fact that" should simply be "because," and the words
"is why" should be deleted and replaced with a comma.
10
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer A :
Choice (A) is correct. It avoids the errors of the other choices by clearly indicating what happened and
when.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) is awkward and imprecise. Without repeating the subject by using the pronoun "they," the
sentence does not make clear what was "not showing any signs of disease."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves improper coordination. Two complete thoughts ("In Germany, . . . earlier" and "no
outward signs . . . however") are joined with only a comma.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) is vague. It is not clear what the phrase "without any signs of disease" is meant to refer to.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E :
Choice (E) is awkward and imprecise. It is not clear what the phrase "not having shown any signs" is
meant to refer to.
11
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Explanation for Correct Answer E :
Choice (E) is correct. It avoids the error of the original by reducing excess words ("since such is the
case") to an appropriate idiom ("and so").
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Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
Choice (A) displays wordiness. The phrase "since such is the case" can be reduced to the more precise
and idiomatic "and so."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
Choice (B) exhibits unclear pronoun reference. It is not clear to what the relative pronoun "that" is
meant to refer.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
Choice (C) involves improper coordination. Two complete thoughts ("In the wild . . . Zaire River" and "no
more than . . . result") are joined with only a comma.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
Choice (D) involves improper coordination. Two complete thoughts ("In the wild . . . Zaire River" and
"the number . . . reason") are joined with only a comma.
12
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Corrected Sentence: Although born in the Midwest, Langston Hughes lived most of his adult life in
Harlem, in New York City, where, like other writers in the 1930's, he wrote some of his finest works.
Explanation for Correct Answer C :
The error in this sentence occurs at (C), where an improper verb form is used. The past perfect tense of
the verb phrase "had wrote" is inconsistent with the simple past tense of the other verbs in the sentence.
Also, the past participle of "write" is "written," not "wrote."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The subordinating conjunction "where" correctly introduces the dependent
adjective clause that modifies the proper noun "Harlem."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
There is no error at (B). The preposition "like" is appropriate to introduce the adjective prepositional
phrase that modifies the proper noun "Langston Hughes."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
There is no error at (D). The superlative adjective "finest" is used correctly to indicate comparison of
more than two things (all of Hughes' works).
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E : There is an error in the sentence.
13
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Corrected Sentence: In constant demand as a speaker, Ms. Chernock has never been busier than she
is now.
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Explanation for Correct Answer C :
The error in this sentence occurs at (C), where a double comparative is used. The adverb “more” is not
needed to modify the already comparative adjective “busier.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The noun “demand” is appropriately used as the object of the preposition “in,”
and the preposition “as” correctly introduces the adjective phrase that modifies the noun “demand.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
There is no error at (B). The singular verb “has” agrees with its singular subject “Ms. Chernock,” the
present perfect tense of the verb phrase appropriately indicates an action completed before the action
of the dependent clause, and the adverb “never” is idiomatic.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
There is no error at (D). The singular verb “is” agrees with its singular subject “she,” and the adverb
“now” correctly modifies “is.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E : There is an error in the sentence.
14
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Corrected Sentence: During the night, there are usually two German shepherds at the warehouse to
guard against robbery attempts.
Explanation for Correct Answer B :
The error in this sentence occurs at (B), where there is subject-verb disagreement. In this inverted
sentence, the singular verb "is" does not agree with the plural subject "German shepherds."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The preposition "During" properly introduces the adverbial prepositional pharse.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
There is no error at (C). The infinitive phrase "to guard" properly introduces the adverbial clause, and
the preposition "against" is the idiomatic preposition to follow the word "guard."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
There is no error at (D). The noun "attempts" correctly functions as the object of the preposition
"against."
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E : There is an error in the sentence.
15
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
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Corrected Sentence: Candy manufacturers applauded the discovery by researchers that students who
smell chocolate while studying and again while taking a test are able to recall more material than
students not exposed to the odor of chocolate.
Explanation for Correct Answer B :
The error in this sentence occurs at (B), where an improper pronoun is used to refer to people. The
relative pronoun “which” is used instead of the pronoun “who” that is needed.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The noun “discovery” correctly functions as the direct object of the verb
“applauded,” and the preposition “by” is the idiomatic preposition to follow the word “discovery.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
There is no error at (C). The adverb “again” appropriately modifies the adverbial phrase “while taking,”
which, in turn, modifies the verb “smell.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
There is no error at (D). The plural verb “are” agrees with its plural subject “students,” and the adjective
“able” properly functions as a subject complement modifying “students.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer E : There is an error in the sentence.
16
ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Corrected Sentence:
Explanation for Correct Answer E : There is no error in this sentence.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The indefinite pronoun “One” correctly functions as the singular subject of the
sentence, and the helping verb “can” agrees with its singular subject.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer B :
There is no error at (B). The negative adverb “hardly” appropriately modifies the verb phrase “can …
determine.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer C :
There is no error at (C). The subordinating conjunction “which” correctly introduces the dependent noun
clause that functions as the direct object of the verb phrase “can hardly determine,” and the singular
verb “contributes” agrees with its subject “which.”
Explanation for Incorrect Answer D :
There is no error at (D). The comparative adverb “more” is correctly used to compare two things, “skill”
and “practice.”
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ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS
Corrected Sentence:
Explanation for Correct Answer E : There is no error in this sentence.
Explanation for Incorrect Answer A :
There is no error at (A). The noun “refugees” appropriately functions as the direct object of the verb
phrase “had not expected,” and the preposition “from” correctly introduces the adjective prepositional
phrase that modifies “refugees.”
Explanatio
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