The Rocking-Horse Winner 原文+译文

PAGE/NUMPAGESTheRocking-HorseWinner  Therewasawomanwhowasbeautiful,whostartedwithalltheadvantages,yetshehadnoluck.Shemarriedforlove,andtheloveturnedtodust.Shehadbonnychildren,yetshefelttheyhadbeenthrustuponher,andshecouldnotlovethem.Theylookedathercoldly,asiftheywerefindingfaultwithher.Andhurriedlyshefeltshemustcoverupsomefaultinherself.Yetwhatitwasthatshemustcoverupsheneverknew.Nevertheless,whenherchildrenwerepresent,shealwaysfeltthecenterofherheartgohard.Thistroubledher,andinhermannershewasallthemoregentleandanxiousforherchildren,asifshelovedthemverymuch.Onlysheherselfknewthatatthecenterofherheartwasahardlittleplacethatcouldnotfeellove,no,notforanybody.Everybodyelsesaidofher:"Sheissuchagoodmother.Sheadoresherchildren."Onlysheherself,andherchildrenthemselves,knewitwasnotso.Theyreaditineachother'seyes.Therewereaboyandtwolittlegirls.Theylivedinapleasanthouse,withagarden,andtheyhaddiscreetservants,andfeltthemselvessuperiortoanyoneintheneighborhood.Althoughtheylivedinstyle,theyfeltalwaysananxietyinthehouse.Therewasneverenoughmoney.Themotherhadasmallincome,andthefatherhadasmallincome,butnotnearlyenoughforthesocialpositionwhichtheyhadtokeepup.Thefatherwentintotowntosomeoffice.Butthoughhehadgoodprospects,theseprospectsnevermaterialized.Therewasalwaysthegrindingsenseoftheshortageofmoney,thoughthestylewasalwayskeptup.Atlastthemothersaid:"IwillseeifIcan'tmakesomething."Butshedidnotknowwheretobegin.Sherackedherbrains,andtriedthisthingandtheother,butcouldnotfindanythingsuccessful.Thefailuremadedeeplinescomeintoherface.Herchildrenweregrowingup,theywouldhavetogotoschool.Theremustbemoremoney,theremustbemoremoney.Thefather,whowasalwaysveryhandsomeandexpensiveinhistastes,seemedasifheneverwouldbeabletodoanythingworthdoing.Andthemother,whohadagreatbeliefinherself,didnotsucceedanybetter,andhertasteswerejustasexpensive.Andsothehousecametobehauntedbytheunspokenphrase:Theremustbemoremoney!Theremustbemoremoney!Thechildrencouldhearitallthetime,thoughnobodysaiditaloud.TheyhearditatChristmas,whentheexpensiveandsplendidtoysfilledthenursery.Behindtheshiningmodernrocking-horse,behindthesmartdoll'shouse,avoicewouldstartwhispering:"Theremustbemoremoney!Theremustbemoremoney!"Andthechildrenwouldstopplaying,tolistenforamoment.Theywouldlookintoeachother'seyes,toseeiftheyhadallheard.Andeachonesawintheeyesoftheothertwothattheytoohadheard."Theremustbemoremoney!Theremustbemoremoney!"Itcamewhisperingfromthespringsofthestill-swayingrocking-horse,andeventhehorse,bendinghiswooden,champinghead,heardit.Thebigdoll,sittingsopinkandsmirkinginhernewpram,couldhearitquiteplainly,andseemedtobesmirkingallthemoreself-consciouslybecauseofit.Thefoolishpuppy,too,thattooktheplaceoftheteddy-bear,hewaslookingsoextraordinarilyfoolishfornootherreasonbutthatheheardthesecretwhisperalloverthehouse:"Theremustbemoremoney!"Yetnobodyeversaiditaloud.Thewhisperwaseverywhere,andthereforenoonespokeit.Justasnooneeversays:"Wearebreathing!"inspiteofthefactthatbreathiscomingandgoingallthetime."Mother,"saidtheboyPauloneday,"whydon'twekeepacarofourown?Whydowealwaysuseuncle's,orelseataxi?""Becausewe'rethepoormembersofthefamily,"saidthemother."Butwhyarewe,mother?""Well--Isuppose,"shesaidslowlyandbitterly,"it'sbecauseyourfatherhasnoluck."Theboywassilentforsometime."Isluckmoney,mother?"heaskedrathertimidly."No,Paul.Notquite.It'swhatcausesyoutohavemoney.""Oh!"saidPaulvaguely."IthoughtwhenUncleOscarsaidfilthylucker,itmeantmoney.""Filthylucredoesmeanmoney,"saidthemother."Butit'slucre,notluck.""Oh!"saidPaulvaguely."Thenwhatisluck,mother?""It'swhatcausesyoutohavemoney.Ifyou'reluckyyouhavemoney.That'swhyit'sbettertobebornluckythanrich.Ifyou'rerich,youmayloseyourmoney.Butifyou'relucky,youwillalwaysgetmoremoney.""Oh!Willyou?Andisfathernotlucky?""Veryunlucky,Ishouldsay,"shesaidbitterly.Theboywatchedherwithunsureeyes."Why?"heasked."Idon'tknow.Nobodyeverknowwhyonepersonisluckyandanotherunlucky.""Don'tthey?Nobodyatall?Doesnobodyknow?""PerhapsGod.ButHenevertells.""Heoughtto,then.Andaren'tyouluckyeither,mother?""Ican'tbe,ifImarriedanunluckyhusband.""Butbyyourself,aren'tyou?""IusedtothinkIwas,beforeImarried.NowIthinkIamveryunluckyindeed.""Why?""Well--nevermind!PerhapsI'mnotreally,"shesaid.Thechildlookedather,toseeifshemeantit.Buthesaw,bythelinesofhermouth,thatshewasonlytryingtohidesomethingfromhim."Well,anyhow,"hesaidstoutly,"I'maluckyperson.""Why?"saidhismother,withasuddenlaugh.Hestaredather.Hedidn'tevenknowwhyhehadsaidit."Godtoldme,"heasserted,brazeningitout."IhopeHedid,dear!"shesaid,againwithalaugh,butratherbitter."Hedid,mother!""Excellent!"saidthemother,usingoneofherhusband'sexclamations.Theboysawshedidnotbelievehim;or,rather,thatshepaidnoattentiontohisassertion.Thisangeredhimsomewhat,andmadehimwanttocompelherattention.Hewentoffbyhimself,vaguely,inachildishway,seekingfortheclueto"luck."Absorbed,takingnoheedofotherpeople,hewentaboutwithasortofstealth,seekinginwardlyforluck.Hewantedluck,hewantedit,hewantedit.Whenthetwogirlswereplayingdollsinthenursery,hewouldsitonhisbigrocking-horse,chargingmadlyintospace,withafrenzythatmadethelittlegirlspeerathimuneasily.Wildlythehorsecareeredthewavingdarkhairoftheboytossed,hiseyeshadastrangeglareinthem.Thelittlegirlsdarednotspeaktohim.Whenhehadriddentotheendofhismadelittlejourney,heclimbeddownandstoodinfrontofhisrocking-horse,staringfixedlyintoitsloweredface.Itsredmouthwasslightlyopen,itsbigeyewaswideandglassy-bright."Now!"hewouldsilentlycommandthesnortingsteed."Now,takemetowherethereisluck!Nowtakeme!"AndhewouldslashthehorseontheneckwiththelittlewhiphehadaskedUncleOscarfor.Heknewthehorsecouldtakehimtowheretherewasluck,ifonlyheforcedit.Sohewouldmountagain,andstartonhisfuriousride,hopingatlasttogetthere.Heknewhecouldgetthere."You'llbreakyourhorse,Paul!"saidthenurse."He'salwaysridinglikethat!Iwishhe'dleaveoff!"saidhiseldersisterJoan.Butheonlyglareddownontheminsilence.Nursegavehimup.Shecouldmakenothingofhim.Anyhowhewasgrowingbeyondher.OnedayhismotherandhisUncleOscarcameinwhenhewasononeofhisfuriousrides.Hedidnotspeaktothem."Hallo,youyoungjockey!Ridingawinner?"saidhisuncle."Aren'tyougrowingtoobigforarocking-horse?You'renotaverylittleboyanylonger,youknow,"saidhismother.ButPaulonlygaveablueglarefromhisbig,ratherclose-seteyes.Hewouldspeaktonobodywhenhewasinfulltilt.Hismotherwatchedhimwithananxiousexpressiononherface.Atlasthesuddenlystoppedforcinghishorseintothemechanicalgallop,andsliddown."Well,Igotthere!"heannouncedfiercely,hisblueeyesstillflaring,andhissturdylonglegsstraddlingapart."Wheredidyougetto?"askedhismother."WhereIwantedtogo,"heflaredbackather."That'sright,son!"saidUncleOscar."Don'tyoustoptillyougetthere.What'sthehorse'sname?""Hedoesn'thaveaname,"saidtheboy."Getsonwithoutallright?"askedtheuncle."Well,hehasdifferentnames.HewascalledSansovinolastweek.""Sansovino,eh?WontheAscot.Howdidyouknowhisname?""Healwaystalksabouthorse-raceswithBassett,"saidJoan.Theunclewasdelightedtofindthathissmallnephewwaspostedwithalltheracingnews.Bassett,theyounggardener,whohadbeenwoundedintheleftfootinthewarandhadgothispresentjobthroughOscarCresswellwhosebatmanhehadbeenwasaperfectbladeofthe"turf".Helivedintheracingevents,andthesmallboylivedwithhim.OscarCresswellgotitallfromBassett."MasterPaulcomesandasksme,soIcan'tdomorethantellhim,sir,"saidBassett,hisfaceterriblyserious,asifhewerespeakingofreligiousmatters."Anddoesheeverputanythingonahorsehefancies?""Well--Idon'twanttogivehimaway--he'sayoungsport,afinesport,sir.Wouldyoumindaskinghimhimself?Hesortoftakesapleasureinit,andperhapshe'dfeelIwasgivinghimaway,sir,ifyoudon'tmind."Bassettwasseriousasachurch.Theunclewentbacktohisnephewandtookhimoffforarideinthecar."Say,Paul,oldman,doyoueverputanythingonahorse?"theuncleasked.Theboywatchedthehandsomemanclosely."Why,doyouthinkIoughtn'tto?"heparried."Notabitofit.IthoughtperhapsyoumightgivemeatipfortheLincoln."Thecarspedonintothecountry,goingdowntoUncleOscar'splaceinHampshire."Honorbright?"saidthenephew."Honorbright,son!"saidtheuncle."Well,then,Daffodil.""Daffodil!Idoubtit,sonny.WhataboutMirza?""Ionlyknowthewinner,"saidtheboy."That'sDaffodil.""Daffodil,eh?"Therewasapause.Daffodilwasanobscurehorsecomparatively."Uncle!""Yes,son?""Youwon'tletitgoanyfurther,willyou?IpromisedBassett.""Bassettbedamned,oldman!What'shegottodowithit?""We'repartners.We'vebeenpartnersfromthefirst.Uncle,helentmemyfirstfiveshillings,whichIlost,Ipromisedhim,honorbright,itwasonlybetweenmeandhim;onlyyougavemethatten-shillingnoteIstartedwinningwith,soIthoughtyouwerelucky.Youwon'tletitgoanyfurther,willyou?"Theboygazedathisunclefromthosebig,hot,blueeyes,setratherclosetogether.Theunclestirredandlaugheduneasily."Rightyouare,son!I'llkeepyourtipprivate.Daffodil,eh?Howmuchareyouputtingonhim?""Allexcepttwentypounds,"saidtheboy."Ikeepthatinreserve."Theunclethoughtitagoodjoke."Youkeeptwentypoundsinreserve,doyou,youyoungromancer?Whatareyoubetting,then?""I'mbettingthreehundred,"saidtheboygravely."Butit'sbetweenyouandme,UncleOscar!Honorbright?"Theuncleburstintoaroaroflaughter."It'sbetweenyouandmeallright,youyoungNatGould,"hesaid,laughing."Butwhere'syourthreehundred?""Bassettkeepsitforme.We'repartners.""Youare,areyou!AndwhatisBassettputtingonDaffodil?""Hewon'tgoquiteashighasIdo,Iexpect.Perhapshe'llgoahundredandfifty.""What,pennies?"laughedtheuncle."Pounds,"saidthechild,withasurprisedlookathisuncle."BassettkeepsabiggerreservethanIdo."BetweenwonderandamusementUncleOscarwassilent.Hepursuedthematternofurther,buthedeterminedtotakehisnephewwithhimtotheLincolnraces."Now,son,"hesaid,"I'mputtingtwentyonMirza,andI'llputfiveforyouonanyhorseyoufancy.What'syourpick?""Daffodil,uncle.""No,notthefiveronDaffodil!""Ishouldifitwasmyownfiver,"saidthechild."Good!Good!Rightyouare!AfiverformeandafiverforyouonDaffodil."Thechildhadneverbeentoarace-meetingbefore,andhiseyeswerebluefire.Hepursedhismouthtight,andwatched.AFrenchmanjustinfronthadputhismoneyonLancelot.Wildwithexcitement,heflayedhisarmsupanddown,yelling,"Lancelot!Lancelot!"inhisFrenchaccent.Daffodilcameinfirst,Lancelotsecond,Mirzathird.Thechildflushedandwitheyesblazing,wascuriouslyserene.Hisunclebroughthimfourfive-poundnotes,fourtoone."WhatamItodowiththese?"hecried,wavingthembeforetheboy'seyes."Isupposewe'lltalktoBassett,"saidtheboy."IexpectIhavefifteenhundrednow;andtwentyinreserve;andthistwenty."Hisunclestudiedhimforsomemoments."Lookhere,son!"hesaid."You'renotseriousaboutBassettandthatfifteenhundred,areyou?""Yes,Iam.Butit'sbetweenyouandme,uncle.Honorbright!""Honorbrightallbright,son!ButImusttalktoBassett.""Ifyou'dliketobeapartner,uncle,withBassettandme,wecouldallbepartners.Only,you'dhavetopromise,honorbright,uncle,nottoletitgobeyondusthree.BassettandIarelucky,andyoumustbelucky,becauseitwasyourtenshillingsIstartedwinningwith…."UncleOscartookbothBassettandPaulintoRichmondParkforanafternoon,andtheretheytalked."It'slikethis,yousee,sir,"Bassettsaid."MasterPaulwouldgetmetalkingaboutracingevents,spinningyearns,youknow,sir.AndhewasalwayskeenonknowingifI'dmadeorifI'dlost.It'saboutayearsince,now,thatIputfiveshillingsonBlushofDawnforhim--andwelost.Thentheluckturned,withthattenshillingshehadfromyou,thatweputonSinghalese.Andsincethattime,it'sbeenprettysteady,allthingsconsidering.Whatdoyousay,MasterPaul?""We'reallrightwhenwe'resure,"saidPaul."It'swhenwe'renotquitesurethatwegodown."Oh,butwe'recarefulthen,"saidBassett."Butwhenareyousure?"smiledUncleOscar."It'sMasterPaul,sir,"saidBassett,inasecret,religiousvoice."It'sasifhehaditfromheaven.Likedaffodil,now,fortheLincoln.Thatwasassureaseggs.""DidyouputanythingonDaffodil?"askedOscarCresswell."Yes,sir.Imademybid.""Andmynephew?"Bassettwasobstinatelysilent,lookingatPaul."Imadetwelvehundred,didn'tI,Bassett?ItolduncleIwasputtingthreehundredonDaffodil.""That'sright,"saidBassett,nodding."Butwhere'sthemoney?"askedtheuncle."Ikeepitsafelockedup,sir.MasterPaulhecanhaveitanyminutehelikestoaskforit.""What,fifteenhundredpounds?""Andtwenty!Andforty,thatis,withthetwentyhemadeonthecourse.""It'samazing!"saidtheuncle."IfMasterPauloffersyoutobepartners,sir,IwouldifIwereyou;ifyou'llexcuseme,"saidBassett.Oscarcresswellthoughtaboutit."I'llseethemoney,"hesaid.Theydrovehomeagain,andsureenough,Bassettcameroundtothegarden-housewithfifteenhundredpoundsinnotes.ThetwentypoundsreservewasleftwithJoeGleeintheTurfCommissiondeposit."Yousee,it'sallright,uncle,whenI'msure!Thenwegostrong,forallwe'reworth.Don'twe,Bassett?""Wedothat,MasterPaul.""Andwhenareyousure?"saidtheuncle,laughing."Oh,well,sometimesI'mabsolutelysure,likeaboutDaffodil,"saidtheboy;"andsometimesIhaveanidea;andsometimesIhaven'tevenanidea,haveI,Bassett?Thenwe'recareful,becausewemostlygodown.""Youdo,doyou!Andwhenyou'resure,likeaboutDaffodil,whatmakesyousure,sonny?""Oh,well,Idon'tknow,"saidtheboyuneasily."I'msure,youknow,uncle;that'sall.""It'sasifhehaditfromheaven,sir,"Bassettreiterated."Ishouldsayso!"saidtheuncle.Buthebecameapartner.AndwhenheLegerwascomingonPaulwas"sure"aboutLivelySpark,whichwasaquiteinconsiderablehorse.Theboyinsistedonputtingathousandonthehorse,Bassettwentforfivehundred,andOscarCresswelltwohundred.LivelySparkcameinfirst,andthebettinghadbeententooneagainsthim.Paulhadmadetenthousand."Yousee,"hesaid,"Iwasabsolutelysureofhim."EvenOscarCresswellhadclearedtwothousand."Lookhere,son,"hesaid,"thissortofthingmakesmenervous.""Itneedn't,uncle!PerhapsIshan'tbesureagainforalongtime.""Butwhatareyougoingtodowithyourmoney?"askedtheuncle."Ofcourse,"saidtheboy,"Istarteditformother.Shesaidshehadnoluck,becausefatherisunlucky,soIthoughtifIwaslucky,itmightstopwhispering.""Whatmightstopwhispering?""Ourhouse.Ihateourhouseforwhispering.""Whatdoesitwhisper?""Why--why"--theboyfidgeted--"why,Idon'tknow.Butit'salwaysshortofmoney,youknow,uncle."Iknowit,son,Iknowit.""Youknowpeoplesendmotherwrits,don'tyou,uncle?""I'mafraidIdo,"saidtheuncle."Andthenthehousewhispers,likepeoplelaughingatyoubehindyourback.It'sawful,thatis!IthoughtifIwaslucky…""Youmightstopit,"addedtheuncle.Theboywatchedhimwithbigblueeyes,thathadanuncannycoldfireinthem,andhesaidneveraword."Well,then!"saidtheuncle."Whatarewedoing?""Ishouldn'tlikemothertoknowIwaslucky,"saidtheboy."Whynot,son?""She'dstopme.""Idon'tthinkshewould.""Oh!"--andtheboywrithedinandoddway--"Idon'twanthertoknow,uncle.""Allright,son!We'llmanageitwithoutherknowing."Theymanageditveryeasily.Paul,attheother'ssuggestion,handedoverfivethousandpoundstohisuncle,whodepositeditwiththefamilylawyer,whowasthentoinformPaul'smotherthatarelativehadputfivethousandpoundsintohishands,whichsumwastobepaidoutathousandpoundsatatime,onthemother'sbirthday,forthenextfiveyears."Soshe'llhaveabirthdaypresentofathousandpoundsforfivesuccessiveyears,"saidUncleOscar."Ihopeitwon'tmakeitalltheharderforherlater."Paul'smotherhadherbirthdayinNovember.Thehousehadbeen"whispering"worsethaneverlately,and,eveninspiteofhisluck,Paulcouldnotbearupagainstit.Hewasveryanxioustoseetheeffectofthebirthdayletter,tellinghismotheraboutthethousandpounds.Whentherewasnovisitors,Paulnowtookhismealswithhisparents,ashewasbeyondthenurserycontrol.Hismotherwentintotownnearlyeveryday.Shehaddiscoveredthatshehadanoddknackofsketchingfursanddressmaterials,sosheworkedsecretlyinthestudioofafriendwhowasthechief"artist"fortheleadingdrapers.Shedrewthefiguresofladiesinfursandladiesinsilkandsequinsforthenewspaperadvertisements.Thisyoungwomanartistearnedseveralthousandpoundsayear,butPaul'smotheronlymadeseveralhundreds,andshewasagaindissatisfied.Shesowantedtobefirstinsomething,andshedidnotsucceed,eveninmakingsketchesfordraperyadvertisements.Shewasdowntobreakfastonthemorningofherbirthday.Paulwatchedherfaceasshereadherletters.Heknewthelawyer'sletter.Ashismotherreadit,herfacehardenedandbecamemoreexpressionless.Thenacold,determinedlookcameonhermouth.Shehidtheletterunderthepileofothers,andsaidnotawordaboutit."Didn'tyouhaveanythingniceinthepostforyourbirthday,mother?"saidPaul."Quitemoderatelynice,"shesaid,hervoicecoldandabsent.Shewentawaytotownwithoutsayingmore.ButintheafternoonUncleOscarappeared.HesaidPaul'smotherhadhadalonginterviewwiththelawyer,askingifthewholefivethousandcouldnotbeadvancedatonce,asshewasindebt."Whatdoyouthink,uncle?"saidtheboy."Ileaveittoyou,son.""Oh,letherhaveit,then!Wecangetsomemorewiththeother,"saidtheboy."Abirdinthehandisworthtwointhebush,laddie!"saidUncleOscar."ButI'msuretoknowfortheGrandNational;ortheLincolnshire;orelsetheDerby.I'msuretoknowforoneofthem,"saidPaul.SoUncleOscarsignedtheagreement,andPaul'smothertouchedthewholefivethousand.Thensomethingverycurioushappened.Thevoicesinthehousesuddenlywentmad,likeachorusoffrogsonaspringevening.Therewerecertainnewfurnishings,andPaulhadatutor.HewasreallygoingtoEton,hisfather'sschool,inthefollowingautumn.Therewereflowersinthewinter,andablossomingoftheluxuryPaul'smotherhadbeenusedto.Andyetthevoicesinthehouse,behindthespraysofmimosaandalmondblossom,andfromunderthepilesofiridescentcushions,simplytrilledandscreamedinasortofecstasy:"Theremustbemoremoney!Oh-h-h;theremustbemoremoney.Oh,now,now-w!Now-w-w--theremustbemoremoney!--morethanever!Morethanever!"ItfrightenedPaulterribly.HestudiedawayathisLatinandGreekwithhistutors.ButhisintensehourswerespentwithBassett.TheGrandNationalhadboneby:hehadnot"known",andhadlostahundredpounds.Summerwasathand.HewasinagonyfortheLincoln.ButevenfortheLincolnhedidn't"know",andhelostfiftypounds.Hebecamewild-eyedandstrange,asifsomethingweregoingtoexplodeinhim."Letitalone,son!Don'tyoubotheraboutit!"urgedUncleOscar.Butitwasasiftheboycouldn'treallyhearwhathisunclewassaying."I'vegottoknowfortheDerby!I'vegottoknowfortheDerby!"thechildreiterated,hisbigblueeyesblazingwithasortofmadness.Hismothernoticedhowoverwroughthewas."You'dbettergototheseaside.Wouldn'tyouliketogonowtotheseaside,insteadofwaiting?Ithinkyou'dbetter,"shesaid,lookingdownathimanxiously,herheartcuriouslyheavyabouthim.Butthechildliftedhisuncannyblueeyes."Icouldn'tpossiblygobeforethederby,mother!"hesaid."Icouldn'tpossibly!""Whynot?"shesaid,hervoicebecomingheavywhenshewasopposed."Whynot?YoucanstillgofromtheseasidetoseetheDerbywithyourUncleOscar,ifthat'swhatyouwish.Noneedforyoutowaithere.Besides,Ithinkyoucaretoomuchabouttheseraces.It'sabadsign.Myfamilyhasbeenagamblingfamily,andyouwon'tknowtillyougrowuphowmuchdamageithasdone.Butithasdonedamage.IshallhavetosendBassettaway,andaskUncleOscarnottotalkracingtoyou,unlessyoupromisetobereasonableaboutit;goawaytotheseasideandforgetit.You'reallnerves!""I'lldowhatyoulike,mother,solongasyoudon'tsendmeawaytillaftertheDerby,"theboysaid."Sendyouawayfromwhere?Justfromthishouse?""Yes,"hesaid,gazingather."Why,youcuriouschild,whatmakesyoucareaboutthishousesomuch,suddenly?Ineverknewyoulovedit."Hegazedatherwithoutspeaking.Hehadasecretwithinasecret,somethinghehadnotdivulged,eventoBassettortohisUncleOscar.Buthismother,afterstandingundecidedandalittlebitsullenforsomemoments,said:"Verywell,then!Don'tgototheseasidetillaftertheDerby,ifyoudon'twishit.Butpromisemeyouwon'tletyournervestogopieces.Promiseyouwon'tthinksomuchabouthorse-racingandevents,asyoucallthem!""Oh,no,"saidtheboycasually."Iwon'tthinkmuchaboutthem,mother.Youneedn'tworry.Iwouldn'tworry,mother,ifIwereyou.""IfyouweremeandIwereyou,"saidhismother,"Iwonderwhatweshoulddo!""Butyouknowyouneedn'tworry,mother,don'tyou?"theboyrepeated."Ishouldbeawfullygladtoknowit,"shesaidwearily."Oh,well,youcan,youknow.Imean,yououghttoknowyouneedn'tworry,"heinsisted."OughtI?ThenI'llseeaboutit,"shesaid.Paul'ssecretofsecretswashiswoodenhorse,thatwhichhadnoname.Sincehewasemancipatedfromanurseandanursery-governess,hehadhadhisrocking-horseremovedtohisownbedroomatthetopofthehouse."Surely,you'retoobigforarocking-horse!"hismotherhadremonstrated."Well,yousee,mother,tillIcanhavearealhorse,Iliketohavesomesortofanimalabout,"hadbeenhisquaintanswer."Doyoufeelhekeepsyoucompany?"shelaughed."Oh,yes!He'sverygood,healwayskeepsmecompany,whenI'mthere,"saidPaul.Sothehorse,rathershabby,stoodinanarrestedpranceintheboy'sbedroom.TheDerbywasdrawingnear,andtheboygrewmoreandmoretense.Hehardlyheardwhatwasspokentohim,hewasveryfrail,andhiseyeswerereallyuncanny.Hismotherhadsuddenstrangeseizuresofuneasinessabouthim.Sometimes,forhalf-an-hour,shewouldfeelasuddenanxietyabouthimthatwasalmostanguish.Shewantedtorushtohimatonce,andknowhewassafe.TwonightsbeforetheDerby,