形容女生幽默的句子

形容女生幽默的句子 1 如果一个女人想要一件钻石头饰，她会解释那样会省下一顶帽子钱。 If a woman wanted a diamond tiara, she would explain that it was to save the expense of a bonnet. 创新句子:妻子对丈夫说:我就要这个钻戒算了，我想给你省一副手套钱。 2 我只知道一个女人不想要金子——她拿走了钻石。 I never knew but one woman who would not take gold --- and she took diamonds. 创新句子:我不喜欢钱，喜欢钻石。 朋友请客，让你点菜，你说:来份龙虾，我想给你省盘儿醋溜白菜的钱。 打车时这样劝自己:打车还能省下坐公共汽车的钱。 3 如果你是个女人，你就会知道女人一辈子最困难的五年是从29岁到30岁。 If you were a woman you’d know that the most difficult five years in a woman’s life are from twenty-nine to thirty. 注:女人调侃自己怕老:女人一辈子最困难的五年是从29岁到30岁。 4 女人只能保守一个秘密——她的年龄。 A woman can keep one secret --- the secret of her age. 创新句子:我不愿意告诉你我已经30了。 5 只要女人看起来能比她女儿还年轻10岁，她就非常满意了。 As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied. 创新句子:谁希望比自己的女儿还年轻10岁? 6 不允许杀死伤害过你的女人，但什么也禁止不了你去想她每一分钟都在变老。 You are not permitted to kill a woman who has injured you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute. 创新句子:我允许你想我一天天变老。 7 “我想知道他是不是知道如何把女人锯成两半，”Larry(人名)沉思着说，“我的意思是，这样你就可以只要有功能，但不讲话的那一半了。” “I wonder if he knows how to saw a woman in half,” said Larry thoughtfully. “I mean, so that you can get the half that functions but doesn’t talk.” 注:丈夫嫌女人唠叨，女人回答:要不你找个魔术师把我锯成两半，你只要会做饭但不说话的那一半。 8 “你曾经在办公室工作过，是不是，Jill(人名)?”一次一个女权主义者热切地问我，“男人骚扰过你吗?” “骚扰过，”我回答，“但还远远不够。” “You worked in an office once didn’t you, Jill?” a feminist [男女平等主义者] once asked earnestly.[热切地] “Did men ever harass[骚扰] you?” “Yes,” I replied, “but not nearly enough.” 创新句子:你骚扰过女权主义者吗? 9 没有什么比女人直接对着坛子喝酒更缺少女人味的了。 There is nothing lefeminine than a woman drinking out of a jug. 创新句子:你喜欢直接对着酒瓶子喝酒的女孩儿吗? 10 二十年的浪漫使一个女人看起来象一座废墟，二十年的婚姻使她象一座公共建筑 之类的东西。 Twenty years of romance[浪漫] make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. 创新句子:那二十年的浪漫婚姻呢? 11 女人的风流韵事就象乘于洪水的潮汐，流向……上帝知道是什么地方。 There is a tide in the affairs of women Which, taken at the flood, leads --- God knows where. 创新句子:人生象一条河，人生象一场梦，人生象一杯茶，人生什么都象。 12 世界上还有比给女人号脉更糟糕的职业呢。 There are worse occupations[职业] in the world than feeling a woman’s pulse. 创新句子:女人调侃自己情绪多变:我感到生活枯燥无聊时，就给自己号脉。 13 没有丑女人，只有不会打扮的女人。 There are no ugly women; there are only women who do not know how to look pretty. 创新句子:别人都夸我长得漂亮，但从不当面夸我。 14 女人非常敏感，她们甚至能听到和闻到不存在的东西。 Women have such keen senses they can even smell and hear noises that don’t exist. 创新句子:我也是这么敏感，有人说我多疑。 15 女人有一种奇妙的本能:除了显而易见的事情，她们什么都能发现。 Women have a wonderful instinct[本能] about things; they can discover anything except the obvious.[显而易见的] 创新句子:你的观察力不错，除了显而易见的事情，大部分你都能看清事物的本质， 16 女人总是激励我们干大事，又是她们阻碍我们去实现。 It is often woman who inspires [激励] us with the great things that she will prevent us from accomplishing. 创新句子:希望男人成就事业，又希望男人在家多陪她。 我太太一直激励要我做大事，现在我的酒量一天天长起来了。 17 对夸奖没有感觉的丑女人大自然很难造出来。 Nature has hardly formed a woman ugly enough to be insensible [无知觉的] to flattery upon her person. 创新句子:别人夸我英俊我也会很高兴，虽然还没人这么夸我。 18女人通常选择愿意选择她的男人。 Generally the woman chooses the man who will choose her. 创新句子:花心男人说:我愿意选择一个感觉我愿意选择她的女人。 19 女人总是在附笔里写出自己的想法。 A woman seldom writes her mind but in her postscript. 创新句子:顺便说一句，你还该我10块钱呢。 20 我妻子有闭月羞花之容，但在这点上我不屑于同别人辩论。 My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments. 创新句子:我妻子很漂亮，我不想同你们争论。 21 一个女人站在门口谈了20分钟，她没有时间进去。 A woman stands 20 minutes talking at a door because she hasn’t time to come in. 创新句子:我不想占你太多的时间，因为我很忙。 22 大多数女人只是当丈夫在睡梦中嘟嘟囔囔时才全神贯注听他们说话。 The only time most women give their orating husbands undivided [专心的] attention is when the old boys mumble [咕哝] in their sleep. 注:妻子说梦话时，丈夫也很专注。